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Thursday, November 17, 2011

Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes



Oops! Sorry! Lots of things have been going on and I have neglected this blog horribly.
First, Sarah and I moved. We now share a condo with 2 single dads and their children. The kids are 5, 8 & 10 and they are here part-time so it is feast or famine with the noise. We really like it here. I can now walk back and forth to work and it saves me bus money and I gained 2 hours a day with not having to use public transportation. Other things have happened but I'm not going to get into it right now.

The other changes I will talk about are on November 1st I found out that I have Type II diabetes 8-( and on the 7th I found out that the ugly thing they cut out of my shoulder was a nodular-infiltrative carcinoma (skin cancer). I think they got it all but I will find out more at the end of the month. I hope.

I have high blood pressure, high cholesterol and I just had to have another tooth pulled. I have to take 4 different medications daily, one twice a day. The diabetes medicine seems to make my eyes permanently blood-shot and I seem to bruise and bleed easily. I'm f'd up. If I don't make some changes soon, I am going to die. I know, we're all gonna die but I don't want to for a long time. I want to see my grandkids. Hell, I want to see my great-grandkids.

This has made me think long and hard about what is happening to my body and how I have abused it. I also have a friend at work who has been talking to me about diet. So, starting Sunday I will be totally changing how and what I eat and I will be blogging about it. I am making a 6 week commitment to the "Eat to Live" diet and when the 6 weeks are over I will re-evaluate but I believe I will continue to follow the diet and I will allow myself to "cheat" very occasionally. I am also setting a target date of my "NOT 50th" birthday to quit smoking. I am giving up the Big Cs...cheese, chocolate, candy, cookies, cakes, coffee and cigarettes along with meat and most dairy. We are going (mostly) vegetarian in a big way, except for the occasional fish and, of course, turkey next Thursday.

I want to be able to get off 3 of my meds, at least.

I will be blogging about the changes and I will try to include my food diary (Yes! A food diary!) as much as possible and we will see if this works. I hope so.

Now, I know what you are thinking. What about drinking? Well, since the holidays and my birthday are right around the corner, I will allow myself have one drink for my birthday, one for Christmas and one for New Year's Eve. I will be turning into an even cheaper date than I already am. 8-)

Well kids, I'll be back here for sure on Sunday to let you know how the first day is going.
Until then...Baby Turtles!!!!!

Saturday, August 6, 2011

Attention!

Lately I have had an overwhelming urge to scream, "Look at me, look at me!!!!"
I think I need attention. I may even be a bit of an attention whore. I think that is why I was in my last relationship. Even though it was never physical and he made me wait endlessly for him to show up and then he would call and cancel or stand me up, he wrote me emails mostly all day long. It was strange because the emails were kind of boring or annoying, I liked that someone was thinking of me. He still emails me, once a day. I don't answer anymore. I guess we all need attention. And hugs. We all need hugs. I need daily hugs and mostly never get them. I think I am hug deprived and it makes me feel out of sorts. I am sure there has been a study on it.

Saturday, July 30, 2011

Mornings

Weekdays, I have to be at work at 8 in the morning but I start my mornings around 4:45. At least I used to, my alarm still goes off then but I've been hitting the snooze button lately. First things first, because I am a woman of a certain age, I run to the bathroom to pee. Then I go out on the patio and have a cigarette and read a book while smoking it. I take my shower, read my emails, play my daily online lottery and visit Facebook and check out the weather forecast on Google Chrome. Get dressed, brush my teeth, take my vitamins if I have any and then, sometimes, I gather stuff for lunch. I'm usually out the door a little after 6. Now here is where I sometimes change it up. I use 3 different bus stops. One is east of Sequoia on Cochran, which used to be my main stop but I haven't been going there much lately. What changed? The new McDonalds on the corner of Cochran and Galena. Now I have a place to get coffee and maybe a sausage burrito AND there are restrooms. Restrooms are very important to women of a certain age. Plus it's a covered bus stop (great to have when it rains and yes, it does rain in Southern California) and there is a trash receptacle. Trash receptacles are important to me also. I make trash. I like having a place to put it so I don't have to carry it around with me. Enough about the trash. My 3rd bus stop is the one across the street from the 7-11 on Cochran west of Sycamore. This is the one I use when I go to the bank before work or if I want to shop at Albertsons or if I want to get 7-11 coffee. I love 7-11 coffee. Do you know lots of 7-11s have these little creamer-size cups of caffeine that you can add to your coffee to give it that fabulous morning burst of happiness? They do! I love them. They make me happy along with this month's flavored cappuccino, it's Raspberry Caramel. I fill most of my cup, did I tell you that if you bring your own cup (any size!!!) the coffee is only 99 cents? Anyway, I fill most of the cup with the Raspberry Caramel goodness, add a little Brazilian Bold then 2 (the daily limit written on the little creamer-sized cup) of the extra caffeine cups and voila! My heart is full. 7-11 also has the best p-nut butter cookies (3 for 99 cents). This 3rd bus stop is where I break the law. I jaywalk across Cochran. I know, but I don't wanna have to walk back to Sycamore and cross at the light. Sometimes it takes forever to get to my turn and the Happy Walking Guy. We'll discuss it later.
Somewhere between 6:36 and 6:42 I get on the bus. On Mondays we have different drivers but Tuesday thru Friday we have Tina. She is very cool and a great bus driver. Fairly fast with no jerky stops. It's a mostly quiet bus in the mornings and there are regular riders. iPad guy who watches pod-casts. Tiny Reading Lady who sits up front and waits until the stop sign before her stop before pulling the cord. For some reason this really irritates me. I don't know why. There is also Sleeping Vons boy. He works at Vons and sleeps almost all the way to his stop. There is also Construction Guy and School District Lady. They get off at my stop. Then there is Richard. We've exchanged names, we actually talk to each other. He's my bus buddy.

Wow! This is taking longer than I thought and I am getting sleepy. I'll be back tomorrow to finish.

*A little bit if nature in suburbia. This is across from where I sit in the mornings waiting for work to open. I can sit and pretend I'm somewhere else*

Note to self; Do not start writing later in the evening after taking meds. You won't finish.
Back to the Blahg!

I get off the bus on Cochran west of First Street. This is where I break the law again by jaywalking across Cochran unless the PoPo are about then I walk to the crosswalk. Now let me say this. Crosswalks are where  I almost get hit by cars. It's a weekly occurrence. Drivers do not like to wait for you to cross the street. It slows them down.  I walk down First Street to either Easy Street where I work or down to Los Angeles Avenue to the Mobil station. If I need a restroom (see above) I go see Jimmy (a very nice man), use the facilities and get a High-Rev Mocha and coffee combo. If I go that route then I walk down L.A Ave. to the gate of the Simi Valley Arroyo and walk the bike path to my sitting spot next to the arroyo and chill with my beverage of the day and a book. I don't always read there. Sometimes I just sit and listen to the water and the birds and the guys at the concrete place but I try to ignore them and just listen to the birds. There are some great birds down there and I am trying to identify them all. Sometimes I take pictures. In the spring and early summer there are ducklings. I love the ducklings. Ducklings make the world all right. I call it Duckling Therapy. 
Below is a picture of a bird I haven't identified yet. It's around 16 inches tall. Do you know what it is?

So I sit there for a while and pretend I'm in a forest somewhere.  I  then go and sit on the steps at work and wait for one of the guys with the keys to open up and I start my day of labor. That is my morning. I think it's a lot nicer than sitting in traffic but I'd still like to have a car again someday. 




Sunday, July 24, 2011

I Am Here!

July 24, 2011

I finally did it. I finally started a real live blog. Will anyone come? Will anyone care? Who knows, 'cuz I don't. It'll still be my place to get it all off my chest or to express my joy or whatever. This is also an exercise in communication as I feel the brain damage from the 80's is affecting how I, uh, um, talk and stuff. 

Who am I? I am Shelle, Michell, Mom and Pearl. No, I do not suffer from a multiple personality disorder but those are names I have been called over the years. I do suffer from bi-polar disorder but I am happily medicated and pretty much a functional human-being. 

I am a 48 year old single working mom and we are fairly poor. I rent a room and take the bus to work. I have a job that I really like (except for the money, but I have a job so I am happy) with people that I like and I try to make the most of everyday, I think, mostly.


Of course I get down. Of course I want more. 


I am trying to start each day with more of a kick-ass attitude and I have been practicing the "find something every day that makes you happy" philosophy.  


Someday I would like to fall in love. 


I guess my writings here will be about all of the things above and more. 


See you soon!